Putting Coke To The Test

Coke – Is It Really The Answer To Everything?

We’ve all heard how bad coke is: “It can strip coins . . . dissolve teeth . . . eat through metal . . . imagine what it’s doing to your stomach?” But the latest one I heard is that coke could be used to clean your toilet bowl. And that really made me think.

Okay, so if you’re toilet-squeamish, perhaps you should stop reading now. But if you’re mildly curious, read on because this weekend past, I did it. I put coke to the test.We live in an area where, since the earthquakes, there’s a lot of something-or-other in the water (very scientific of me, I know) that causes a hard, tan-ish buildup at the bottom of our toilet. Yep, it’s pretty gross. Normal household toilet cleaning fluids don’t get rid of it. The only thing I’ve found that will remove the god-forsaken stuff is a highly toxic, seriously concentrated liquid that I have to buy from a specialist shop.

It’s ridiculously expensive, of course, and would likely eat my eyes right out of my sockets if I dabbed it on.

Anyway, when I heard coke would strip your toilet bowl as quick as look-at-you, I was all over it. I rushed out, bought a couple of litres of coke (full-fat, just in case the diet/zero versions didn’t have the necessary magic ingredient), and tipped it down the toilet. Then I left it there, fermenting or festering or doing whatever coke does in the bottom of toilets, and went about my (non-toilet-related) business.

When I returned about five hours later, I gave the bowl a quick scrub, then flushed the coke away. Waited with bated breath for the water to clear.

Result: fail.

Complete and utter fail. Shoving coke down the toilet achieved absolutely no cleaning or removal of buildup that I could see.

So there you go. I’ve saved you the waste of all that time, coke, and hope. You’re welcome. And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a toilet bowl to get toxic with.